Most of us know what listening is supposed to look like. We stay quiet while the other person speaks. We make eye contact. We avoid interrupting. We nod to show that we are paying attention. And yet, many of us have had the experience of speaking to someone who did...

When neurodiversity enters a workplace conversation, it is usually framed as an inclusion issue. How do we accommodate neurodivergent employees? How do we make hiring more accessible? How should managers respond when someone discloses that they are autistic or have...

The conversation went badly. You know it. They know it. And pretending otherwise will not protect the relationship. Maybe you became defensive. Maybe you interrupted, shut down, or rushed toward a solution. Maybe someone tried to tell you how they were affected, and...

Most difficult conversations do not unravel because people lack good intentions. They unravel because, under pressure, people often move into protection. Sometimes we avoid what needs to be said because we are worried about making things worse. Sometimes we become...

This past weekend, my best friend Graham passed away after an eighteen-month battle with ALS. For twenty-three years, he was one of the people I could count on. We met regularly, spoke openly, and shared a friendship that spanned some of the most formative chapters of...

Have you ever found yourself saying something in a meeting and then replaying it for the rest of the day? Or snapping at someone you care about and wondering where that reaction came from? Maybe you've walked away from a conversation thinking: "That wasn't how I...

What it means to feel heard at work and why the nervous system knows when it doesn’t. This week, our team had a thoughtful conversation about what it means to feel heard, and perhaps more importantly, what it feels like when we don’t. What emerged was striking in its...

One of the biggest misconceptions about difficult conversations at work is that they’re primarily communication problems. Often, they’re nervous system problems - first. Not because people are irrational. Not because they lack professionalism. But because...

It’s Mental Health Awareness Month, and I’ve been thinking a lot about how often we talk about mental health as though it exists separately from the systems people are trying to survive inside. We talk about stress. Burnout. Anxiety. Emotional exhaustion. But we don’t...

There’s a version of leadership that gets rewarded. It’s steady. Contained. Clear. It knows how to move things forward without disrupting too much. It makes people feel like things are under control. And for a long time, I thought that was the goal. But there’s...

Not everything that is said is equally heard. In many leadership conversations, listening is treated as a personal skill. Be present. Don’t interrupt. Show that you’re engaged. All of that matters. But it doesn’t capture what’s actually happening in most workplace...

It starts as something small something that doesn’t quite hold. A comment. A decision moving too quickly. A moment that feels off. And then comes the quieter moment: the decision not to say something. We call what happens later conflict. But what I see, over and over...

Autistic leadership exposes a tension most workplaces don’t know how to hold. Being wired for clarity, directness, and literal interpretation in environments that rely on performance, tact, and unspoken rules. Where how something is said often matters more than what...

There’s a lot of conversation right now about AI. How to use it. How to regulate it. How to keep up. In many organizations, the focus has been on building AI literacy: Understanding the tools. Learning the language. Developing guidelines for use. All of that matters....

There’s a growing narrative that EDI training doesn’t work. I hear it often: “It’s performative.” “It doesn’t change anything.” “People attend and then go back to doing the same things.” In some cases, that critique is warranted. But I don’t think it’s telling us what...